Question: Can women who are forty and over have fun dating? Yes, they can. But, unfortunately many do not. As an over-40, single mother of three I am very aware of this fact. You see, many women 40 and over talk to me about the dating experiences they have (or do not have!).
I'll admit it: Dating can be tough. However, it doesn't have to be. In fact I actually learned how to date. It's true. I got to a point where I realized I needed some help - not professional help from a therapist (although I'm not against that) - but, well, training.
But I couldn't find any formal training out there for women 40 and over on how to date. So, the alternative for me was to read as many books on dating as I could and to talk to women. Oh, and of course, to continue dating, no matter how disappointed or disillusioned I got.
So, needless to say, I have a lot of experience being "out there in the trenches!" Here are a few things that I know will enable you and all women 40 and over to have fun dating:
1. Safety first: Be responsible for your own safety. So, until you know a man, meet him at the location of your date and make sure it's a public place. Also, make sure you park in a safe place such as a parking garage that has an attendant.
2. Realize that chivalry is not dead. Let your date open doors for you, accept his compliments with a warm "thank you," and if he wants to pay for the evening, let him. Good men enjoy doing nice things for women they like. So let the man you're out on a date with treat you well.
3. Talk less and listen more. Take the pressure off of yourself and avoid thinking that you have to keep the conversation going. Let your date ask you questions and listen to what he has to say about himself. You'll be more relaxed and even find out interesting things about your date.
4. Go with the flow. If you're enjoying your date's company, then let the date last as long - or as short - as it is going to last. Often it's an unconscious thing we do by saying something such as, "Oh, it's getting late ..." Avoid being the one to end the date because if you do you could miss out on getting to know something interesting or fun about your date.
5. Trust your gut. Now, I know that above I suggested you avoid being the one to end a date. However, there are exceptions to this. If you're out on a date with a man with whom you're uncomfortable - for any reason - then trust your gut and end the date. Make sure you end the date in a polite and tactful manner. Doing so has more to do with your safety than anything else. Avoid rejecting a man to his face - you never know how a person may react to rejection. Simply end the date at an appropriate time (such as when the meal is over), and say you have to get home because you have a long day the next day.
Of course dating can't be boiled down to a few tips. There is a lot more to dating! However, consider the 5 above suggestions as small steps you can take to enjoying dating more. If nothing else, you're at least increases the likelihood that you'll have more fun in your life.
Kimberly Anne is over 40, single and a mother of 3 children. She's a seasoned businessperson and published author. Kimberly resides in San Diego with her children where she works full-time as a marketing professional and author. You can reach Kimberly by visiting her site: