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How To Know if Someone is Safe To Date?

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By : Sophia Martinez    99 or more times read
Submitted 2019-05-14 10:31:31
e feeling of wanting more information about a potential suitor.

Maybe a person seems great - strong job, killer photos, fun vibe - but his or her answers to profile questions are sparse. Or you just want to know a tad bit more about what position he holds at that prestigious company or whether there are any other pictures out there for you to drool over before you meet.

Perhaps something seems a little off, and you don’t exactly trust what he is telling you. So you want to do a little detective work. Or you’ve had the experience of meeting a guy who is 20 pounds heavier, 10 years older, and much more bald than he let on. Understandably, you don’t want to go through that again.

These are all normal feelings, says Laurie Davis, the Founder & CEO of eFlirt Expert, an online dating consultancy. “They’ve already led with information, not chemistry, so they want more of it.”

With Davis’s help I put together a list of the best ways to research someone you meet online (and the times you should lay off the digital stalking altogether.)

Read between the lines of a profile.

Before you turn to Google and Facebook to check out your potential suitor, try looking harder at his or her online profile. There are a few inside tricks to use, says Davis. If their relationship intentions are foggy, meaning they say something along the lines of “Let’s see what happens,” it probably means they aren’t looking for something serious. If their photos are grainy, if they are wearing hats and sunglasses in every photo, or if every photo looks different, they are trying to disguise themselves or not portray themselves authentically. Another warning sign is if I person doesn't use "I statements." That means "they are usually lying," says Davis.

Remember that your potential dates are digitally stalking you also. Davis had a client who was bisexual, had been previously married to a woman, and now wanted to date men. While this is information that usually wouldn’t come up in a first or second date when you Googled her the first item that appeared was the New York Times wedding announcement. Davis and the woman talked about the issue and decided she would need to bring up her history faster than she might be comfortable with otherwise. “What is available about you needs to alter conversations you have with your date,” says Davis.

Lastly, do a background check.
There is no definite answer on how to have a perfect date, however, these things can help you to have a safe dating experience. For a better outcome of the journey, you can try to do a background check here ("
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